The Opening Ceremony of the Beijing Olympics lasted about 5 hours and involved thousands of amazing performers all moving in perfect unison. I watched the whole spectacle and was enthralled.

Rumour has it that tomorrow's handover of responsibility for the next Olympics in London, will be attended by Gordon Brown, arguably our worst Prime Minister ever, and will be accompanied by a full EIGHT MINUTES of spectacular entertainment featuring David Beckham, football hasbeen, a clapped out old red London double decker bus, and a reading of a Radio 4 shipping forecast! ... breath-taking!! ... couldn't the budget have stretched to at least a couple of Morris Dancers, a Pearly King playing the spoons, and some toothless old guy making ugly faces through a horse collar?